Wendy Shalit: Girls Gone Mild Young Women Reclaim Self Respect and Find It's Not Bad to Be Good



Book read Girls Gone Mild Young Women Reclaim Self Respect nd Find It's Not Bad to Be Good – cafe1919.org

It seems weird to say this but this was fun read Shalit s wry sense of humor pops up in unexpected ways such s when she suddenly takes off on A Bollywood Affair a reveriebout KUGEL parties s n lternative to NYC s sex saturated CAKE parties There re stories of girls The Scent of Rosa's Oil and women whore going gainst the grain of low standards nd sex sells Nobodys Angel (Willow Park, and this leavens the overall depressing news that the book reportsbout our current cultural environment in ll its darkness nd vapidityGenerationally speaking I m somewhere in the middle of the women discussed in this book I have two young daughters nd my parents were Baby Boomers I experienced some of the pressure to be bad s girl nd especially when I got to college Defending Hearts all the pressure to be comfortable with my body which meant letting other people intrude on your personal spaces near s I could tell But what I experienced was less intense than what is currently cceptable And fter ll in the 1990s when I was teen dumpy jeans logger shirts nd boots were the style so if you wanted to keep yourself covered up there was t least way to do so without stigma Wearing Feel the Heat (Phoenix Agency, a shirt with vulgar sexual message would have still marked you s One of Those Girls not good thing But on the other hand we got bombed with massive TMI in sex ed class Sudden Fury (The Last Gunfighter, and when my mother protested that maybet 12 years of Spiky age I didn t need to knowll bout oral we were blacklisted s that weird prudish Christian family even though my mom was nd is n Dungeon of Death agnosticnd there was general ttitude that only repressed people cared Love Rockets about having strict personal boundariesAs mother I m doing my best to keep my girls protected from this vulture like hypersexualized culture nd it s A Deceptive Homecoming (Hattie Davish Mystery, amazing how early you have to start the constant vigilance Reading this book made me feel really goodbout my decision to homeschool s I believe that the toxic social environment in many schools is the single biggest threat to girls intellectual nd professional chievement I lso felt validated in my disillusionment with the feminism of my contemporaries nd what s supposed to pass for empowerment these days I noticed while back for instance that the feminist nd women s issues section of the left wing webzine Saloncom consists mostly of fluff bout celebrities nd sexual trend stories bout hooking up porn prostitution etc And not hard hitting reporting either for instance bout how porn reinforces negative images of women Just stuff like OMG porn is fun wow breathless oohing over the fact that like women can have sex too It has struck me nd s juvenile nd even backwards There s so much to being woman than having body Almost A Gentleman and having sex And there should be so much to feminism than Vagina Monologues vapidity what would your vagina wear Butny that s what we re supposed to settle with Does nyone ever stop to wonder why HmmmI really liked A Return To ModestyWendy Shalit s first book but this one just didn t do it for me I felt like she could of left out most if not ll of the descriptions bout the current sexual revolutionshe didn t leave much to the imagination One would expect book bout bout modesty to be written in well modest manner Plus many of these behaviors t least I feel tend to ere on the extreme side of things nd don t necessarily represent the norm I see what s on TV nd in the magazines nd m very concerned with the messages that society is sending these girls but I don t feel like I need play by play Wendy s points re well made but I had to sift through whole lot of shmuck to find them I ppreciated the few stories of girls that re choosing to go mild I just wish there had been of them And gain these stories ered on the extreme side too I mean reallyhow many 15 year olds do YOU know that tour the nation giving lectures on modesty There re many good things happening out there enough to write book on ironically enough that illustrate the goodness in many of our young women Do I feel like they re waging n uphill battle Yesth. At twenty three Wendy Shalit punctured conventional wisdom with A Return to Modesty Bound (Torn Trilogy, arguing that our hope for true lasting love is not problem to be fixed but rather wonderful instinct that forms the basis for civilization Now in Girls Gone Mild the brilliantly outspoken uthor investigates n emerging new movement Despite nearly naked teen models posing seductively to sell us practically everything nd the proliferation of homemade sex tapes s star making vehicles youth led rebellion is Loyalty and Lies already changing courseIn Seattlend Pittsburgh teenage girls protest gainst companies that sell sleazy clothing Online nineteen year old describes her struggles with her mother who she feels is pressuring her to lose her virginity In small town outside Philadelphia

E media is very powerful nd they the media know it The sad truth is that those who re mild in every sense of the word don t now never have nd never will get the coverage they deserve I can see the lies the media is serving our Nation nd find it sad that there ren t like me who recognize it so that brings me to the last point of this review I think Wendy Shalit was writing this for the people who haven t seen the light if you will But most of these people would never pick this book up nyway nd if they did they would lready be on the defensive side To bad because they re the ones who need to hear it This book hit the nail on the head for me Shalit put into words exactly my thoughts on modesty nd sexuality The book took me back ten years to my high school days when friend told me Be free while signaling with her hand for me to remove my hijab headscarf I remember telling her This makes me free nd over the years I ve come to ppreciate just how liberating modesty can be Shalit posits that female empowerment does not come from women partaking in meaningless casual sex s men do nor is Claiming Her a woman being empowered by dressing or not dressing for that matter liken escort True empowerment comes from being comfortable in your skin without having to show it to the whole world And like she says just because woman covers up or has the decency to keep her sex life private it does not mean she is not comfortable with her sexuality or that she is shamed of her body In fact the contrary is true She is so comfortable with her sexuality that she doesn t see the need to make it public businessI gree with Shalit that the sexual liberation these days is just s oppressive to women or even so s was the repressive pressures put on women in the past Girls feeling like they have to dress like prostitutes to get ttention dolls that promote sexuality in CHILDREN these re pressures women doN T needThere definitely is double standard when it comes to male vs female sexuality But like Shalit says instead of lowering women s standards to that of men s engaging in meaningless casual relations while repressing emotion dressing immodestly etc why not hold men to the same high standards of women expecting fidelity nd monogamy demanding respect etc By dressing nd Murder Go Round acting modestly woman does JUST THATThe only negative I had in this book was that Shalit failed to even recognize Muslim women in her book The hijab is worn for precisely the reasons she outlined in her book How Foreign Policy Decisions Are Made In The Third World: A Comparative Analysis and it would have been nice to see her include interviews with Muslim womens I m sure she could have found Alcohol Fuels: Policies, Production, And Potential a modest Muslim woman or two The things we do for researchI tried to read this bookgainst Jessica Valenti s dvice nd my own better judgment Cambridge Modern History volumes 1-5 as part of research project Alas it s unbearable Shalit has created the worst kind of propaganda The Heart Of The Hawk (Book 1) a book thatctively misinterprets its source material to shore up Spices, Saints, and Saracens: The Egyptian Wanderings of a Dominican Friar, 1483 a regressive message And then dresses said regressive message ups empowerment In the bits I managed to power through Shalit took issue with everything from the historicism of Pleasantville to the bitch mentality promoted in the Dixie Chicks song Not Ready to Make Nice Now for the record the characters of Pleasantville travel into spot on 50s TV show not the 50s proper Empire of the Waves: Voyage of the Moon Child and the Dixie Chicks released Not Ready to Make Nice in the wake of endless boycotts CD burningsnd death threats But context is clearly irrelevant to Shalit She further misrepresents the work of numerous reputable sex educators Heather Corinna Cory Silverburg The Object of Performance: The American Avant-Garde since 1970 and the entirety of Planned Parenthood for starters replacing their gooddvice with heterosexist sexist drivel based on Of Mice and Men anecdotal evidencend her bstinence only genda Plenty of studies have used valid measures to disprove her thesis that we ve made sluttiness socially cceptable nd thus girls re unhappy so we ll need to bake pies nd wait out marriage but since Shalit stuck with hearsay I ll respond in kind As 20 something lady from the gen. N eleventh grade girl upset over I Was Anastasia a “dirty book” readloud in English class takes her case to the school board These Choice of the Cat are not your mother’s rebelsInn Three Cups of Deceit age where pornography is mainstream teen clothing seems stripper patentednd “experts” recommend that we learn to be emotionally detached Sparrow Road about sex key A Banner With a Strange Device: A Novel of Boston and callously targetedudience–girls–is fed up Drawing on numerous studies nd interviews Shalit makes the case that today’s virulent “bad girl” mindset most truly oppresses young women Nowadays s even the youngest teenage girls feel the pressure to become cold sex sirens put their bodies on public display nd suppress their feelings in order to feel ccepted Winners Take All: The Elite Charade of Changing the World and temporarily loved many young womenre realizing that “friends with benefits?.

Eration in uestion trudging through this book made me far unhappy than being sexual ever has Reader discretion The Point of It All: A Lifetime of Great Loves and Endeavors advised According to Shalit you can be bad girl Yoga: The Art of Adjusting and have non marital sex which will be horriblend you will immediately regret fterwards be scarred for life or you can be good girl The Neural Basis of Free Will and wait til marriage The world is not so blacknd white Wendy Shalit is trying to make valid point it is okay to be good girl However in order to prove she knows what the bad girls re up to nd she is therefore uthorized to make the case for choosing good she details so many graphic nd disgusting things that I just had to put this book down I was Locked and Loaded (U.S. Marshals, also little disturbed that she gave little or no credit to religion s means of instilling values Her premise seemed to be that some girls Travels: Collected Writings, 1950-1993 are just born with the desire to be chastend modest but others can t really be taught to be that way Overall it is okay in parts but probably not worth wading through Whenever I have spoken to If Wishes Were Horses a baby boomer feministbout sex it has felt something like this A woman grows up t the end of thirty years of drought while her daughters grow up in the midst of thirty years of flood but the memory of the drought is so bad that nytime she sees her daughters bailing water out of the boat she instinctively cries Stop Do you want to send us back to the drought GIRLS GONE MILD is book that cknowledges we need to bail out the boat but that we can do so without going back to the drought The book relates the hope that fourth wave of feminism will empo This book was jaw dropping I had no idea how much sexuality is ctually marketed to girls starting round ge 4 The book talks bout the Bratz dolls toddler tees that say Sexy nd Lust nd Limited Too selling rhinestoned thongs Wow This was n eye opening read that seriously every parent of Rainbow Brite: Starlite Saves the Day a young daughter needs to read Wendy Shalit bugs me She points out lot of things A Social History of Modern Art, Volume 2: Art in an Age of Bonapartism, 1800-1815 about the way women especially young womenre viewed treated by society that suck then ccuses pretty much everyone who s not born gain Christian preaching bstinence of contributing to the problem Apparently the only solution nd conveniently the complete nd final solution to The Unspeakable Mind any of this is for young women to just say no to sex until they find nice young man to marryThere re so many problems with this I don t even know where to start Good lord While I gree with the basic point the Time and Philosophy: A History of Continental Thought author is making I didn t like this book for two reasons The firstnd biggest reason is that the Murder at Beechwood author spends so much time going into the graphic details of the sexual problems in our society thats modest chaste good girl I felt uncomfortable reading it I often didn t even understand the slang nd terminology she was using nd found the book overall to be discouraging Too much talk bout the problem nd not enough bout the good Ask an Astronaut: My Guide to Life in Space alternativeThe second reason is that while I enjoyed her wittinessnd sense of humor the book would have made it s point better if it wasn t written in such n rgumentative fashion It felt disorganized Jane and the Stillroom Maid (Jane Austen Mysteries, and like she was repeating the samergument over Crude World: The Violent Twilight of Oil and overgainI did not in fact read the entire book I first started skimming past the disturbing ccounts of what sexuality in America has become then found myself skipping to the next chapter when I got tired of each over rgued point Then when I set the book down to go to bed fter having looked t most of the book found I didn t have Alien: Sea of Sorrows any desire to pick it back upgain in the morningI Journey Of Fate also found much of what she presentss Judas of Nazareth: How the Greatest Teacher of First-Century Israel Was Replaced by a Literary Creation a new idea basically that being good helps us be happierto be common sense That may be because I grew up with strong valuesnd religious beliefs that Make it Happen: Surrender Your Fear. Take the Leap. Live On Purpose. already led me to the path of goodnessnd happiness In the end the only good this book did for me was to make me even grateful for that upbringing which taught me the way to live nd be happy Apparently most of our children re growing up without that kind of direction nd re unhappy s result of ? Satellite are oftennything but And Blank Darkness as these girls speak for themselves we see that what is expected of them turns out to be very different from what is in their own heartsShalit reveals how the media one’s peersnd even parents can undermine girls’ uests for their uthentic selves details the problems of sex without intimacy nd explains what it means to break from the herd mentality Makers and choose integrity over popularity Written with sinceritynd upbeat humor Girls Gone Mild rescues the good girl from the realm of mythology nd old manners guides to show that today’s version is the real rebel She is not “people pleasing” or repressed; she is simply reclaiming her individuality These empowering stories re sure to be Americana: A 400-Year History of American Capitalism an inspiration to teenagersnd parents li.

Wendy Shalit ¸ 3 review