Jowita Bydlowska: Drunk Mom

Ar old but they re both soooo xhausted from caring for the baby that they need to take his and hers separate vacations It boggles He also seems to be cheating on her a lot or at least spending a worrying amount of time having late night drinks with other women Gee I wonder why Could it be that sleeping with a neurotic blackout drunk is not that On Such a Full Sea enjoyableThentire book I was wondering why he stayed with her and maybe it s just that she lets him cheat I also wondered why she had a baby in the first place when she so obviously has zero skills as a parent By book s nd or as far as I got before returning it and getting my money back I came to the conclusion that she s just not that intelligent After all despite the fact that she spent three years sober after completing AA when she inevitably falls off the wagon she still can t seem to grasp the concept that she s an alcoholic Hmmm did you not just spend three years admitting you were an alcoholic Any person with a shred of intelligence knows that it s not something that goes away Lastly the writing God it s just not good I saw some other reviews that described it as raw vivid brave No no no It s not raw it s bland and the sparse metaphors and imagery are a cacophony of words and not in a good way They often seem untouched by the yes of a professional Cannibal editor Mostly her style if you can call it that is blunt non descriptive sentences and lots of repetition This may have been novel 100 years ago but now it s just trite Vivid again no Just no After the first 14 or so I realized I felt like I knew nothing about this woman and other than the fact that there s just not much to her the writing is also just incredibly shallow There s no depth here Brave Nope It s a woman with a personality disorder profiting off of child abuse I m frankly amazed that any respectable publishing company would actually publish this piece of garbage I m also amazed she hasn t been arrested But I guess I don t understand how the laws work in Canada She was after all living on maternity leave payments from the government for a year much of which she spent in a drunken stupor not bonding with the baby Good job mom How about you go get your tubes tied so you don t inflict this on some other poor kid Yep I hated the book THAT much Tricky one this When I first heard the buzz about this book I assumed it was being written by a woman in say her late 40s looking back on her life at a time when alcoholism and motherhood collided and written with hindsight reflection and a pretty clear indication of the kind offfect her actions had on her children So I was surprised to learn that it was actually written by Jowita Bydlowska a Toronto writer younger than me with barely two years of motherhood and one year of sobriety under her belt That s not to say that this isn t a well written book it is Bydlowska can write and if it weren t for my own kids and their needs I would have sat and read it in one go As it were I managed it to finish it in two days while neglecting my children at a level barely worth a mention It s an Mastered (The Enforcers, engaging story for sure It s also raw dirty messy and at times painful to read like any good addiction tale or confessional And like the good ones there s some decent insight into her situation some very clear and powerful passages regarding the thought processes of a drunk the self loathing thexcuses the unbreakable cycles the destructive thoughts and actions and the regrets that perpetuate the cycles But we don t get much in the way of Why We get a cursory glance into a complicated perhaps abusive relationship with her parents but only that We get a cursory glance into her adjustment period as an immigrant and we get a cursory glance into the nature of her relationships with other people including the relationships with her boyfriend She yells he sighs Only at the very Man, Son of Man end do we learn that he is not perfectither and her son despite them being at the centre of the chaos In fact my biggest criticism is that the Mom part of the Drunk Mom story feels superficial glossed over Bydlowska writes beautifully about the power of the first moments of motherhood and the transformative nature of motherhood but not often Besides the fact that she now pushes a stroller while teetering on heels drunk instead of leaning on someone Alter Ego else while teetering on heels drunk the baby feels like a prop an accessory We are assured time and again that the baby was always safe but I guess that s the problem with writing a book about being a drunk mom if she wrote about her interaction with the baby while she was a drunk mom we would probably see that there were many times that actually the baby wasn t safe and who s going to put that in print But I guess that comes back to my orig. Rah the Heart Is Deceitful Above All things and Harold's End 'Drunk Mom is a stunning harrowing read Why harrowing Not just because of the dramatic story of a new mother at thedge of her tether And not only because of Jowita Bydlowska's skill as a writer and the crisp original way she tells it What's most harrowing about Drunk Mom is that you can't stop reading it this the dark now told tale that lurks in the shadow of very seemingly normal family' Ian Brown author of the Boy in the Moon 'A brave brilliant and scathing self portrait Full of nergy and insight If Frida Kahlo had been a writer she might have been compared to Jowita Bydlowska' Patricia Pearson author of A Brief History of Anxiety Yours and Mine 'Fearless and troubling and so very humane Bydlowska xplodes the cutesy momoir genre You'll read it in one sitting' Katrina Onstad author of Everybody Has Everythin.

Last week when I received an advanced copy of Drunk Mom I was a giddy kid on Christmas morning and at the same time antsy pantsy like on a first date I resisted reading Jowita Bydlowska s memoir at first because I knew the moment I crack it open the first chapter wouldn t be nough Or the second or the third I d have to cancel my plans Unseen City eschew a looming project proposal deadline and forego homework shut myself in read the whole thing straight through ignoring all responsibilities and obligations You know like an addiction The prose is fast paced to the point and very much in the moment Jowita Bydlowska takes you right there with her in the liuor store stroller in hand trying to calm the paranoia throbbing in her head You wake up with her in the Montreal hotel room disoriented about last night s shenanigans and act as her accomplice as she tries to slip out of the hotel panic stricken that someone will recognize her or you from the night before Reading Drunk Mom is akin to you watching a friend on their birthday drinking to the point of blacking out and you do nothing because you ve been there before or perhaps you re drinking too and life s a party andveryone s fun and sexy Most of all you re fun and sexy It s hard to judge or do anything in the nanoseconds of delirious action It s only in the aftermath of the frenzy you wonder what happened and maybe just maybe you shouldn t have accepted that last drink Drunk Mom is not big on sentimentality It s what makes it a compelling memoir and there are no cumbersome tones of apologies Art either This is not a self help book Jowita writes sticking close to this thesis throughout the book She s a jerk and Jowita makes no bones about it coming clean with her lying and the colossal disasters as a result of her relapse Nobody can make anybody use Using is personal decision Jowita confesses just after she leaves rehab two months before another relapse And that s the magic of Drunk Mom the prickly honesty overmpty flowery promises and the personal decision to stick with being honest long after the last drink and on the dangerously seductive God Is in the Crowd edge of another It s hard to shake something your brain says you need and reading Drunk Mom with itsnergy and razor sharp style brings that compulsion to the forefront making you want You know like an addiction The writing deserves 3 stars but the author as a human being barely deserves 1 star The story is sad and vividly told But I was actually disappointed in myself for reading it She is so narcissistic self indulgent and pretentiousand I think these traits would apply Attracting Songbirds to Your Backyard even sans her addiction issues I wanted to focus on the writing but I could not look beyond how much I dislike her Profoundly disturbing portrait of real addiction Pay no attention to reviewers who say I liked the book but I didn t like her By that metric people wouldn t listen to Van Morrison or watch Russell Crowe actThere were moments in the first half of the book where I had to look away for a bit just too claustrophobic But can we fault the writer for doing her job and describing something in a way that makes us appreciate the horror on a visceral level I don t think soI wish her luck and a ton ofmpathy It s not over and it may never be over but at least she has done much of the heavy lifting And if you re thinking about reading the book wondering if you can learn something about your own situation You can And you and others in your life deserve to have you do this too I wish you luck and send you The Matriarchs (The Family empathy as well Had to read this for my last grad course Apparently my prof is friends with the author I think that makes it a conflict of interests to teach it in this course Almost 3 months ago I finished reading this book since then we had countless discussions on it in my course and Iven did a presentation on one of the chapters which received positive feedbackYet I am still torn about this book On the one had I am impressed and in awe of the author s courage to share this dark time in her life with the public On the other hand I am deeply conflicted about what to think regarding her shared Notes for the Everlost experiences More than once I was very clear about my opinion of the stories she shared They bring about strong reactions from the reader which is always a possibility when such dark subject matters are addressed But I couldn t shake the feeling that I had judged the author that I had condemned her and labelled her a drunk and that was thend it of itThis memoir has not only forced me to uestion the blurred lines between the amount of detail an author should share but it has also put me in a rather uncomfortable position to re When I Moan (Vassi and Seri 1: Russian Stepbrother Romance) examine the role of the readerMy main point of critiue is the writing style For all the details of her uestionable There are many alcoholic mothers Only one has told her storythree years after giving up alcohol Jowita Bydlowska found herself throwing back a glass of champagne like it was lemonade 'It's a special occasion' she said to her boyfriend And indeed it was It was a party celebrating the birth of their first child It also marked Jowita's immediate full blown return to alcoholism and all thatntails for a new mother who is at first determined to keep her problem a secret Her trips to bottle shops stores are in and out missions Perhaps she's being paranoid but she thinks people tend to notice the stroller Walking home she stays behind buildings in alleyways taking discreet sips from a bottle she's stored in the nappy bag She know she's become a villain a mother who drinks; a mother who ndangers her child She drinks to forget this And then the trouble really starts Jowita Bydlows.

Ehaviour she shares the author adopts a rather impersonal writing style by keeping the reader at an arm s length from her deeper private thoughts and motions It is a contradiction that keeps battling it out throughout the Crush It! entire book and makes for an interesting readingxperienceOverall I am still very conflicted about this book I cannot say if I would recommend it It certainly makes for a complex study considering various points of viewElliotScribbles wow and man i stayed up way way too late last night because i couldn t stop reading this book it s a tough read at times which given the title one must Attracting Birds to Your Backyard expect really but the thing bydlowska does amazingly well is convey the mindset of an addictedalcoholic person the frantic the chaotic the scheming the blacked out the re framing the behaviours she uses in planning to buy her alcohol drinking her booze dealing with thempty bottles lying to her boyfriend Deep Listening endangering her baby s life being aware of this guilty over it yet unable to do differentlywell it s amazing it s a warty story and while moments are sensational the opening scene has her finding a baggie of coke in a washroom stall at the ROM in toronto which she then proceeds to snort i never felt like bydlowska was purposefully trying to make anything out to be worse or bigger than it was her alcoholism was is ugly people arou Oh in case you re wondering I m not a cocaine addictI prefer to drinkYou found me in the middle of my story and I happened to have just found a baggie of cocaine in that bathroomBut honestly I prefer drinkingI prefer drinking to anything in the world sex food sleep My child my lover anythingI love to drink Sometimes I think No I am drinkIt s like my bl This memoir was tough to get through while also being a very fast read It s tough because Jowita relapses after her baby is born and it s so hard to read about a parent who tries to balance her drinking with being a good mother because the deal with alcoholism is that yes sometimes you might be able to get drunk after the baby goes to sleep and nothing goes wrong but babies have needs 247 Jowita would breast feedvery other day she d stay sober for a while to get the toxins out of her breast milk pumping the toxic milk out and supplementing his diet with formula But it s also a uick read because while I wanted her to sober up again reading about the terrible decisions she made is like watching the TV show Shameless in the sho This book was very hard to read and I almost gave up on it many times Not because it was badly written or boring or I didn t like the characters but because the author was me Maybe I didn t Bird-by-Bird Gardening experienceverything she did but her crazy thoughts and crazy language was me It was a reminder and sometimes I need just thata reminder I love reading addiction memoirs They can be incredibly rewarding and I have read some amazing ones by people like Sarah Hepola Kirsten Johnson and Carolyn Knapp This is not one of those books What this is is someone profiting off of child abuse You know that thing where people get drunk and then breast feed their infant Yeah that s child abuse You know that thing where people get blackout drunk and pass out on the floor while being the only person home with the baby Yeah that s child neglect You know that thing where you have an infant and a boyfriend and you decide to take a solo vacation to another city to get drunk and possibly sleep with another guy Well that s just being a shitty person And she proves it to us over and over that she is indeed a shitty person The Works of Saint Augustine even when sober She has this bizarre idea of herself as being some incredibly beautiful woman inspiring the desire ofvery man she meets In reality she is a butter face She also is constantly seeing herself as above others around her describing others in her rehab group as clowns and talking sht about unattractive people She acknowledges her snobbishness when vacationing with her boyfriend to a small town they make fun of the locals for not being as sophisticated as them You know acknowledging that you re a piece of sht doesn t make it any better She s sophisticated and yet somehow finds herself getting drunk at the park by herself on a regular basis That sounds like a homeless person activity but she s not homeless She lives in a house with her boyfriend and she can t drink at home because she constantly lies to him about not drinking and constantly puts the baby in harms way by getting blackout drunk when her boyfriend isn t home and she s supposed to be taking care of the child Her boyfriend is not much better He later admits he knew she was drinking yet still continuously left her alone with the baby including for an Unbuttoning the CEO (The Suits Undone entire week while HE went on vacation Yes the baby is still less than a ye. Ka's memoir of her relapse into addiction is anxtraordinary achievement the writing is raw and immediate It places you in the moment saddened and appalled but never able to look away With brutal honesty DRUNK MUM takes us through the binges and blackouts the self deception and less successful attempts to deceive others the humiliations and My Teacher Is a Robot extraordinary risk taking She shines a light on thendless hunger of wanting just one drink and one again while dealing with motherhood anxiety depression and rehab Advance Praise for Drunk Mom 'Jowita is matter of fact funny fearless and irreverent as she lifts the veil to chronicle what it means to be a young mother when both baby and mother have their own bottles the shame and the inner voices as well as the joy and relief this book is for anyone who has ver struggled to make it through a day' Laura Albert aka Jt LeRoy author of Sa.

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I was born in Warsaw Poland I moved to Canada as a teenager Currently I live in Toronto I wrote a bestselling memoir called Drunk Mom published by Doubleday Canada and HarperCollins Australia 2013 & Penguin USA 2014 The book is also self published in the UK I’ve sold movie and TV rights do Drunk Mom to LD Entertainment in 2013My novel GUY Buckrider Books came out in October 2016